The home educating walk is a walk of courage: courage to be different, courage to find our own groove and courage to stand in the face of curve balls. At this time in UK history, the Christian home educator often feels like a pioneer. More often than not, families start out alone, grappling with a thousand question marks whilst also managing the comments and queries of the world and the church.
William Gurnall writes that ‘cowards never won heaven’, and without a courageous spirit, many home educators would abandon ship in the first few months and years. It takes courage to keep a child home with us when all of our friends are using childminders and nurseries. It takes courage to recognise that bad days are just a part of the learning curve. It takes courage to refuse to be fearful when we have a three-year-old and we cannot quite map out in detail what the next ten years of his education might look like!
Where do we find courage? Do we find it in the good days, in the compliments we might receive, or any positive outcomes we experience along the way?
We find courage in the promises of God:
1. God is Our Father
‘If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!’ (Matthew 7:11)
Too often, we are tempted to give up because of the question marks.
When my oldest child was born. We did not gift him upfront with all the food, clothing and security that we will provide him whilst he is in our home. We did not give him a lifetime’s worth of advice on the way home from the hospital. Instead, we provided him daily with love, warmth and nourishment. As he grew, we dressed him in bigger clothes and fed him solid food. We substituted his cot for a bed. We taught him to walk, speak and read as the months and years rolled by. In the same way, God is our father. He does not supply us with everything we might need for our home educating journey at the very beginning but keeps us dependent on him and supplies as and when we have need.
When we started out, people often asked me how I would teach GCSE science. When my oldest child was three, I can quite honestly say that I had no idea how I would teach GCSE science! However, at this particular juncture, I did not really need to know these details to move forward. In those first few months and years we needed to be convicted of the need to home educate, we needed a course to be set (and the Lord providentially placed ‘The Well-Trained Mind’ in my hand through a lady I met). We needed to learn good routines and systems. We needed to be able to manage on one income and we needed to learn how to train our children in obedience. In his providential care, the Lord supplied and taught.
I have no doubt that as our children grow, he will show us which path to take when it comes to exams and further training. He will show us through the ordinary means of our child’s interests, our own resources and perhaps providentially by opening particular doors. We can lean on the faithfulness of God who has always been faithful to us.
2. God Seeks Godly Offspring
‘Did he not make them [husband and wife] one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring…’ (Malachi 2:15)
I wonder how many families have been guilt-tripped into placing their children in government schools because of a bad exegesis of the ‘salt and light argument’. It takes a particular courage to insist that our five-year old child is not our church’s tool to evangelise their local primary school, but instead is desperately in need of the grace of God.
How does God save children? The answer is very often through the ordinary means of Christian family. God teaches through the prophet Malachi that the purpose of marriage is godly offspring. If we use the means that God has designated, (a godly education, prayer, the gospel and attendance at a local church) then we have a reason to hope that our children will one day confess Christ. If we do not use the means, we do have that same reason to hope. Of course, God is sovereign and will save his people from their sins regardless of our obedience or disobedience but still he has spoken for a reason and we must one day give an account for our actions.
3. God Says Believers are ‘Salt and Light’
‘You are the salt of the earth… You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.’ (Matthew 5: 13-14)
If we take seriously our duty to raise our children in the Lord, then we are distinct. Distinctiveness is not something we rustle up under duress. It is the natural outworking of a life lived in devotion to God. In his book ‘Keeping the Heart’, John Flavel writes,
‘Time was, when Christians conducted themselves in such a manner that the world stood gazing at them. Their life and language were of a different strain from those of others, their tongues discovered them to be Galileans wherever they came.’
Our distinctiveness becomes apparent from one of the first conversations that we have with a new acquaintance. Why do you have all your children with you? Because we home educate. Why do you home educate? Because want to give our children a Christian education.
It is also this distinctiveness that may well draw criticism and insensitive remarks about our educational choice. We probably do not always feel that we fit in with those around us. If we are not comfortable in feeling different to others, then we are far more likely to abandon ship. If God promises that we as believers we are salt and light, we can expect some to be drawn to Christ through our life and we can also expect some to mock and scoff.
And finally…
Home education is heart work – the mother’s heart. Perhaps we do not need the same courage as the saints across history who have been thrown to the lions for their beliefs. Nevertheless, it does take a particular type of bravery to stick out like a sore thumb in our educational choices. We will not stay the course if we pay too much attention to what other people might say. We will not stay the course if we think that a bad day is a good reason to give up. We will only hold our nerve if we are also holding on to the promises of God.
‘He will not forget your faithfulness. And when you come off the field, He will receive you as joyously as the Father received Him upon His return to heaven.’ (William Gurnall, ‘The Christian in Complete Armour’)
