The pens and pencils are out, the Maths book is open, the white board is up. It is Day 1 of Home Education ‘in earnest’. Expectations are high; nerves are jangling. The first morning goes astonishingly well; the first morning goes astonishingly badly. Perhaps it falls somewhere in between. A few months down the line and it has been difficult to get into a flow. There are a few highs, but a significant number of lows and we feel like a one-man rowboat in the middle of the Atlantic.
I wonder how universally Christian home educating mothers find the first couple of years hard? It is easy enough to look back and see the Lord’s faithfulness well after the race has begun, but I realise that for those just off the starting block, it can be harder to hold our nerve. Perhaps it might help to take into consideration these three obstacles to our peace. After all, we are commanded to ‘throw off everything that hinders…’ (Hebrews 12:1)
1. The Devil
Why is it so easy to overlook the fact that the devil hates what we are doing? In his book ‘Christian in Complete Armour’, William Gurnall writes, ‘Do not doubt for a moment that the devil will hurl all his fury at those who love God’s word.’ There is a war in heavenly places over our children’s souls and when Christian parents take the decision to raise their children in the instruction of the Word, rather than allowing the state to raise them in the instruction of the world, this spells disaster for the devil. What can be horrifying to him than for little children to be daily instructed in the Scriptures? Solomon exhorts us to ‘Remember also your Creator in the days of your youth,’ (Ecc 12:1) for a reason. It is much harder for an adult to abandon their sinful life for Christ than it is for a child. Not only that, but adults whom God graciously saves have often accumulated a significant amount of baggage from their Christless years. It should come as no surprise that the devil will throw everything at us that we may abandon our quest to raise our children in the instruction of the Lord.
2. Doubts
Who has not been plagued by uncertainty at some point along the line? The Lord’s servant often finds himself warding off doubt, whatever task he has been called to. For the home educator, the first doubt masks itself in comparison with other families. I strongly encourage you to fight this temptation with all that you have! The temptation to compare is a thief: it steals our own peace, and it steals our joyfulness at the successes of another. If I talk to you about how you home educate, I will admire you, I will learn from you, I may well be convicted by what you say, but I refuse to compare myself with you. Conversation with other home educators builds me up. I will not allow the devil to use it as a tool to destroy me.
The second major doubt is one that masquerades itself as humility: the fear that we are not up to the task. Perhaps on a bleak day the job can seem overwhelming, but who are we to comment on whom God can and cannot use? Let’s refresh our memories with the likes of Gideon from the threshing floor, David the shepherd boy and Peter the fisherman. If the mountain looms too high, then we probably are not spending enough time refreshing our hearts with the God who created the mountains.
3. Balance
I think most home educating mothers are prime candidates for the ‘trying-to-do-too-much-at-the-beginning-club’. Recalling our own schooldays, we design a rigid timetable complete with seven subjects on day one and then 45 minutes after breakfast we are already behind! The fruit of trying to do too much at the outset is frustration for parent and child and a sense of failure. It is impossible to keep up the pace and everyone is miserable.
A good rule of thumb for home educators is the ‘one thing at a time’ rule. I began by teaching my child to read. Once he was able to hold a pencil we did five minutes handwriting a day, followed by twenty minutes of maths. I tried to make sure that each activity was a habit before we added something new.
Conclusion
Eleven years down the road (I count our journey from birth) and today I never question whether or not we are on the right track. I have my own doubts and worries about the details of what we do, but I have never been more affirmed in my belief that my children are better off at home with me than they would be in the state system. To be honest, no school parent has ever tried to persuade me otherwise. I do remember, however, those first few years of worry and wobbling.
What an encouragement to call to mind that the One who promises to never leave nor forsake us (Deut 31:6) is with us as our great expectations become those first uncertain steps.
