There is a line of thought that says the children of believing parents should be placed in the school system in order to reach out to unbelievers. I am all for evangelism and it is easy to see where this thinking comes from. Government schools are full of unbelieving, desperately lost children and the idea is that children from Christian families should be a godly witness and the Lord’s tool in conversion. However, there is something crucial that needs to be considered first: in our eagerness to reach the lost, it is easy for parents to forget that the children in our homes whom we hope will reach these young souls are very often lost themselves. I think we need to acknowledge the fact that God has placed unconverted children in our families who desperately need to hear the gospel. Here are a few thoughts as to why we need to take this fact so seriously:
1. We Forget That Our Children Need the Lord.
One reason for this is that most young children (say under the age of 10) who have Christian parents and who go to church regularly, say that they love Jesus and are sorry for their sins. While this should give us hope and encourage us as parents, it is tempting to think that our job is done. All of my children would say that they love the lord, but while I pray this is true, I hold it very lightly. I am not sure at this point whether they say this to please us, or because it is a genuine work of the Holy Spirit.
2. We Must Look for the Fruit of Conversion
God alone is the judge of all people’s souls, but it is right to be looking for the fruit of conversion in our children’s lives (John 15:8, Matthew 7:20).
Do our children show any conviction of sin? Is there a desire to learn more about the Lord? Do they show a genuine concern about the lost? If, on the other hand their lives display deliberate, repeated sin or their values are more aligned with those of the world than those of the Word, perhaps we should stop kidding ourselves that they belong to the Lord. We need to urgently pray for their conversion.
3. We Are Alert to the Sin in our Children’s Lives
The reason that our children sin is because they descendants of Adam and conceived in sin (1 Corinthians 15:22; Psalm 51:5).
We are all born in sin, including our children, and the doctrine of original sin should make us even more alert to the sin in their lives and to use all means possible and every opportunity to preach the gospel to our children. What means has the Lord provided? The teaching and preaching of his word, prayer, our example and our care as to what situations we place them in and which relationships and friendships we encourage. it is unwise to ignore these means and then to simply hope for the best.
4. Many Young Children Do Start to Believe
We can praise God that many of our little ones do start to believe in their early years. Perhaps they cannot put their finger on the day or the hour, but as they grow in knowledge and understanding, watered by the prayers of their parents, they are genuinely saved. This does not mean, however, that they are ready to withstand the onslaught of humanistic ideas taught in the classroom, and far less that they can ‘change the system’. When a seed has just germinated, we do not expect it to withstand the freezing cold and bad weather it might be exposed to, but we nurture it and wait until it is strong before we leave it out to the elements. Likewise, a new Christian must be discipled and trained. The disciples spent much time learning from the Lord before they were sent out into the world, and even then, they were sent out two by two and not alone.
To those with older children who appear to have strayed: take heart. Arthur Hildersham (a Puritan) writes as an encouragement to Christian parents in his book, ‘Dealing with Sin in our Children’. He writes that, ‘None have more cause to expect and, with patience, to wait for a blessing from God… The fruit of your labour may appear hereafter, though it does not appear yet, as experience has proved in many good men’s children who for a long time lived most ungraciously’.
The Lord burdens us in different ways. Some of us are called to the elderly, some to our neighbours, some to a particular people group or to children who are in school. I have a concern for young people in their ‘teen years’ and since I have a concern for them, I do something about it. The last couple of summers I have been visiting local parks with other believers to seek opportunities to share the gospel and engage in discussion with the young people we meet. I do not send my children to do the job for me.
We do not need to feel guilty about the perceived lack of evangelism emanating from our families when we chose to educate our children at home. Very often the critics have missed an important point: that in his providence the Lord has placed unconverted children in our families and that we are engaged in active evangelism: day after day after day…
